Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows

Dir: Dave Green

2016

***

2014's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles wasn't the greatest of reboots. The story was fairly horrible, it was full of unnecessary human characters and the CGI was overcooked. The very same could be said of 2016's sequel Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows. From the outset, the CGI action is in your face and near impossible to watch. I watched it in 3D and could only register half of what was happening at one time, usually about five seconds after it had happened. I don't think this is down to me being a miserable old git either, I have perfect vision, I just couldn't take it all in comfortably. That said, there were times when the 3D effects were amazing, usually in the far shots. New character Eric Sacks from the previous film (played by William Fichtner) was thankfully absent, as was minor character Beradette Thompson (Whoopi Goldberg). Tohoru Masamune hasn't returned to play Shredder and neither has K. Todd Freeman (Dr. Baxter Stockman) or Minae Noji (Karai). There was controversy in 2014 among Turtle fans when it was announced that the four heroes were to have new voices and that fan-favourites Josh Pais, Robbie Rist, Brian Tochi and Corey Feldman would be replaced. Some took comfort in Johnny Knoxville taking one of these roles, he added a certain something to the film but even he wasn't asked to return. This mass exodus of actors usually suggests trouble for a franchise but I don't think caused any harm. I was more into Masters of the Universe and M*A*S*K when I was a kid, Turtles was fun and I enjoyed it for its ridiculousness but I was never hard-core fan. I was however a huge fan of the computer game. This film seems to me to be a huge set up for a game I would love to play. As far as the overall film goes, it is more of the same nonsense really; Will Arnett's Vern Fenwick is still pointless and completely different to the original character, the turtles are too big and are extremely annoying, the dialogue is dazzlingly awful and Megan Fox looks faker than the CGI. Even though it must have taken ages to create, it looks like it was rushed (indeed, only half of Megan Fox's bottom lip seems to have been botoxed, a rush-job for sure). No surprise then. However, there are a couple of elements to the film that I absolutely loved. Fan favourites Bebop and Rocksteady were left out of the sequel to the original film. They were seen as dated characters, something the franchise should move on from and far too difficult to create in a live-action film anyway. Originally created because Playmate Toys, toy-makers of the original Turtle line, demanded more 'Mutants' to sell to the kids, Bebop and Rocksteady are the epitome of the weird and wonderful (and probably quite rushed) ideas that could only come from the late 80s/early 90s. Products from my childhood, utterly ridiculous but irresistible to everyone from that generation. They got the character down to a t. If that weren't enough, the mighty Kraang is revealed as the film's big baddie. Seriously, the most ridiculous cartoon character ever created and they made it work in a live-action movie without changing him even slightly. What you'd hope was the film's strong point but would guess would be the lowest, turns out to the best thing about the film after all, exceeding all expectations. They even got the voice right with Brad Garrett lending his vocal talents (although I was a little disappointed that Roseanne Barr didn't reprise the role, as she voiced Kraang in the animated series between 2013-2014, I kid you not). My favourite character as a kid was always Casey Jones and while I was thrilled that he makes an appearance, I felt that he should have remained in character for more of the film but that said, Stephen Amell did a good job. Many of the action scenes were impressive but forgettable, all but one that is. There is an action sequence that involves an airplane and the Brazilian rain-forest that is absolutely breath-taking, especially in 3D. These combined elements make this rather silly reboot a respectable three star film. I can hardly believe it myself but once you get over the stuff we disliked from the first film, you might just find something in the fast-paced silly escapism that isn't completely detestable. Sure, the character development is terrible, they could have had far more suspense and the Kraang could have been the big surprise reveal but that would be taking it far too seriously. Dumb but very very fun, which I think was always Kevin Eastman's original intention.